Global Warming

Singularity

SPM

Choices

Spontanious Combustion

 

But something like that would never happen, because what could you possibly be protesting in a place where people are just handing out free bagels?

Poorness

I can't wait until I can file taxes. Last year I got hecka returns on my federal taxes. I ended up owing Utah like $16. They told me where to send the check but not who to make it out to so I made it payable to "Utah Taxers". I assume there wasn't any problem with that because they cashed it. Anyway, I'm broke mostly due to some large purchases I've recently made.

Tuition to this place was costly:

No one ever said it wasn't going to be inexpensive to get a degree in mortuary science.


To get there I bought Tommy:

Who was named after

the white Power Ranger and not

my friend Tommy from high school.

Then I started paying rent every month to have a place of my own at 

this place. The apartment was empty when I got there (of all physical items, at least. It was full of cat smells that took several bottles of Febreze to get rid of) so I had to buy a bunch of nice things to put in it

and by nice things I mean secondhand furniture and cheap Mainstay brand items. What's nice is there's a church that's not even across the street- it's across the parking lot

and I've got a key for it. So I play basketball there literally every night except for last night because it was a) Sunday and b) -16 degrees outside. I'm not any better, but I'm also not any fatter than I would be if I wasn't going. I'm still poor, but at least I don't have to pay for a gym membership.

You Mean Those Weren't Real Dinosaurs?

My First Thought

Last night

Last night the septic tank in the apartment where I live and work went supernova. By that, I mean it exploded. Unlike stars in space, however, our septic tank cannot expand at the speed of light in an infinite number of directions. The contents of our overflowing tank can only move in one direction, which is down a 3 inch overflow pipe. I don't know who made the final decision to have said overflow pipe end in the basement of the apartment building as opposed to, say, literally ANYWHERE else, but I would love to hear their logic. My guess is the plumber responsible was at one point into competitive paint thinner sniffing. I'm not sure what the rules to that game are, but I know the prize is a pipe that shoots refuse all over the basement.

I wasn't sure what to do to fix the problem, but I knew I needed to stop the water (and I use that term, "water", very loosely) so I shut off the mains to the apartment building. The other tenants were not very happy about that. I told them there was a problem with the septic system and the ground directly under them was rapidly filling with sewage. They were less than sympathetic and still wanted their water on. I tried explaining to them that this was all their fault for using too much water in the first place, at which point they went from being mildly annoyed to openly perturbed. I didn't pay them too much heed, as I had bigger problems than worrying about making friends with the other renters.

Despite no longer being freshly feed, the septic tank filth repository turned filth spewer was still drawing ripe resources from the adjoining leech field and continued to redeposit them in the basement. The contents of the tank needed to be drawn, not discharged (again). There are several sanitation services that are infinitely more qualified to handle these types of problems. Sadly, none of them are staffed at 9pm on a Wednesday evening and thus we were left to our own devices. A pool vacuum attached to large water storage barrels was lowered into the tank to lower the contents level. The original plumbers were creative in their placement of the overflow pipe; it was only fitting the solution to the problems that decision created be equally creative.

After trucking off nearly 700 gallons of waste (or, in more relative units, about 14 bathtubs full of refuse) we turned our attention to the standing water problem in the basement. A perfectly good shop vac was ruined sucking up the two to three inches of water, ruined because no equipment is fit for duty after going through what we put that vacuum through. This morning I nuked the crap out of that room (literally) with ammonia. Normally you distill ammonia with water and use it to clean, but not when you're cleaning up after what happened last night. Then you open a bottle of ammonia, dump it directly on the floor, grab another one, repeat. About halfway through my third bottle I began to feel my lungs changing color, from a healthy pink to a molting canary yellow, and I thought I might be getting a little carried away. But I ascribe to the axiom "better safe than sorry" and dumped another two bottles on there before running outside for some oxygen. Today the basement's clean again, but if you drop a sandwich on the floor down there you might just want to let it go, five second rule notwithstanding.  

Dating Tips #4

Have an aquarium at your place. Keep three fish in it. When you show it to your date, tell her two of the fish have names but the third one has none. Then ask her if she'd like to name it. This makes her feel important and creates a connection between her and your place, plus you can talk about "her" fish anytime in the future.

For bonus points give the other two fish couples' names, like Odette and Derrick or Elizabeth and Darcy, you know, to put her in that romantic mindset.

Plinko

Check Engine

Cursed

Seeing Red

Men's Health is a silly magazine. Luckily, it has a bunch of silly subscribers who will pay every month to finally find out how to get serious abdominal muscles. Honestly, on the cover of every month is says this issue will tell you how to get ripped abs. Want to know how to do that, but for free? Do sit ups and stop eating crap food. You're welcome.

Check Your References

Custom Menu

Drawing hats is a lot harder than you might think. I love McD's. Spicy McChicken with light mayo and extra lettuce, medium fries, two apple pies, and a large drink all for under five bucks. So tasty and so cheap. So bad for you, but when I'm eating it I so don't care.

 

(no Cami, not everyone wears red at McDonalds)

Class List

In case you were wondering if you have what it takes to become a future funeral director, take a look over the couses you'd have to take before you can begin practicing.




MTSC 100 - Funeral Service Orientation

This is a required course for all new incoming Mortuary Science students. The course will explain state and federal legal and ethical concerns in the field as well as prepare the student for working in the preparation room. This course will focus on student concerns, rules and regulations, study skills and campus orientation.

MTSC 105 - Burial Customs Throughout Hist

This course examines ancient, medieval, modern and contemporary burial customs. Historical, sociological, religious and cultural perspectives are studied. Special emphasis is placed on the emergence of the American funeral service. Topical areas of discussion include western attitudes toward death and dying, funeral service organizations and associations, the history of embalming and specialized religious and fraternal services.

MTSC 110 - Mortuary Law

Fundamental concepts and principles of law applicable to the operation of a funeral home. Topics include legal environment of business; contracts, business organizations, including partnerships and corporations; agencies; personal and real property; estate law; cemetary law; rights, privileges, and responsibilities of survivors; duties, authority and responsibility of licensed funeral directors which are essential for licensure and professional practice.

MTSC 120 - Hygiene & Sanitary Science

A survey of the basic principles of chemistry and microbiology which relates these disciplines to Mortuary Science especially as they pertain to sanitation, disinfection, public health, and embalming practice. The development and use of personal, professional and community hygiene and sanitary practice is encouraged.

MTSC 130 - Embalming Theory & Practice I

Introduction to the theory and practice of arterial embalming and supplement treatment with some emphasis on chemistry as it relates to embalming.

MTSC 140 - Approaches to Death & Dying

This course discusses the philosophical and ethical aspects surrounding death and dying, as well as the decision making involved in these situations. It highlights the interaction of ethical, sociological, medical, psychological, legal, political and religious issues that surround end-of-life decision making.

MTSC 180 - Cross-Culturlal & Relig. Persp/Brvmnt

This course examines bereavement across various cultures. Special consideration will be given to major religious traditions regarding death. The world religions of Hinduism, Buddhism, Judeo-Christian, Islamic as well as Asian and Native American attitudes toward death are presented. The exploration of the richness of mourning traditions across the world is examined with an aim of increasing sensitivity and understanding toward the issue of death.

MTSC 200 - Psychology of Grief

A survey of contemporary attitudes toward death and dying in the United States, with emphasis on the death care system. Grief and bereavement in children, adolescents, and adults is discussed.

MTSC 205 - Funeral Service Counseling

A survey of counseling techniques as well as the functions of the counselor. The student will understand basic skills in counseling and learn to apply them to funeral service.

MTSC 210 - Funeral Service Management

A discussion of business, financial, religious and ethical principles inherent in the operation of a funeral directing establishment. Students will be exposed to the essential financial operations including financial analysis, insurance, advertising, personnel, public relations, inventory control, accounts receivable and mechandising. In addition to formal classwork, students will take scheduled field trips to product manufacturing and distribution plants.

MTSC 220 - Pathology

The general principles of pathology as applied to a study of the diseases which affect various organs, with particular emphasis on those conditions which relate to embalming and legal problems.

MTSC 225 - Restorative Art

Instruction in the problems of restoration of human remains to approximate a natural appearance. The student will be given theoretical and practical experience in the use of materials employed in restoration including a discussion of the qualities, effect, application and uses of color and cosmetics.

MTSC 230 - Embalming Theory & Practice II

A continuation of MTSC 130, Embalming Theory and Practice I, with greater emphasis on difficulties encountered in special cases. In order to successfully complete this two-course sequence, each student shall be required to actively participate in the embalming of at least ten human remains under the college's supervision.

MTSC 240 - Contemp Cncpts in Bereavement

This course will prepare students, both personally and professionally, for the role of today's funeral service director. The focus will be on the current state of the funeral service field and what is being expected of funeral service professionals. The course will discuss contemporary management and communication styles as they pertain to successful funeral home practice and provide a dynamic view into the planning, advising and counseling function of the director. Students will be asked to design and conduct funeral services and grief counseling sessions. Students will recognize the symptoms of compassion fatigue and discuss strategies to avoid burnout.

MTSC 250 - Pre-Professional Mortuary Sem

This seminar focuses on the skills necessary to find and obtain an internship placement and pass the National Board Examination. Students learn about employment strategies, job searches and interviewing skills. Students will prepare a professional portfolio, a resume, a letter of interest and complete a reflective paper assessing their own professional preparedness. Students will practice test taking strategies and utilize review materials provided by the NCE Board in preparation for the board exam.

MTSC 260 - Grieving Adolescents

This course deals with adolescent grief and loss. Adolescence is a unique developmental stage with its own strengths and weaknesses. This course is designed for teachers, parents, nurses, clergy and all caregivers who desire to be more effectible in their interactions with young adults who are grieving.

MTSC 261 - Grieving Children

This course focuses on the special needs of children who are grieving because of any loss. Loss is presented as part of attachment theory and is broadly defined. This course is designed to help teachers, parents, nurses, clergy, and all other care givers to be more effective in enabling children to grieve.

MTSC 262 - Understanding Grief & Loss

This course presents an overview of the recent theories about grief and loss. Special emphasis will be placed on applying theories to situations both at home and in the classroom. This course is designed to enable teachers, parents, nurses, clergy and others to be sensitive to the special needs of all grievers.

MTSC 280 - Adv Bereavement Studies

This course is the capstone in the Bereavement Studies certificate sequence. It examines specific topics, issues, and emerging practices in the bereavement field. Special topics will include complicated grief, grief therapy, disenfranchised grief, aftercare in funeral service, sex, race and gender issues in counseling and small group dynamics. This course has a service learning component and requires participation in a weekly integrating seminar.

MTSC 285 - Bereavement Internship

This course is designed to combine voluntary experience with academic learning and will require a minimum of 20 hours of volunteer service within the semester. This field experience includes observation and/or participation at a community service agency or funeral home. In addition, students must keep a written log of their expereinces and attend a weekly seminar to discuss and integrate related reading and volunter work.





There's also a national exam you have to take plus a year internship before you can practice. So if you're ever wondering what I'm doing at any point in the next 18 months, it probably is going to be related to something in the above paragraphs.

Anime

Apparently all these movies were/are something special in terms of Japanese movies. And some parts of some of them are kind of cool I guess. That doesn't mean they're not all super weird though. And I do know one Japanese person, but they don't talk to me anymore so it's still okay.

Steven Meets Boy Meets World

I always finish an episode a lot sadder than I was when it started. Those 20 minute windows into Cory's and Sean's and Topanga's lives over seven years... I don't know what it is about them. I feel the same way whenever I see the music video for "At Your Funeral". It probably has something to do with this. If you want, you can buy four seasons of "Boy Meets World" on DVD. Just make sure there aren't any high ledges or pills nearby while you watch them.